Self-care (Sacred Selfishness)

Why didn't I send out my newsletter last week? Did I fail? 

Or, 

Was it Self-care?

What transpired over the past couple weeks provided me the opportunity to clarify my priorities. 

I had a lot going on—chaos was present—and I had to choose where to devote my energy. 

A few of the unusual areas that required my attention were:

- A rather intense psychedelic medicine experience that required conscious time and energy to process. 

- Uncovering some challenging but insightful realizations about the patterns I fall into within relationships.

- Preparing for and embarking on my upcoming travel plans to leave the country.

When it came time for this month's newsletter, I could have been more prepared to release my content.

But I wasn't.

I could have rushed it and forced it out.

But that would have caused unnecessary tension and felt inauthentic. 

I could have beaten myself up, berating myself as a failure, as my inner-narrative used to so commonly do. 

Instead, I chose Self-care. 

Self-care is a term that gets thrown around quite often these days; oftentimes expressed in an array of ways, which leaves many people who hear the term confused. 

So, what does Self-care really mean? 

What does it look like?

And more importantly, how can we practice it in a way that benefits ourselves and others?

For starters, Self-care is not a one-size-fits-all, cookie-cutter method. 

It's a personal, dynamic, and often tricky process that involves taking care of your mental, physical, social, and spiritual well-being in a way that feels true to you. 

Contrary to much of the counterproductive thought pervading modern culture, it is not selfish or indulgent to prioritize your own needs and happiness. 

It is a form of Sacred Selfishness that allows you to shine brighter for the people you care about and for the world as a whole.

"Okay...

But what does it really look like in action?" 

Self-care is not just about pampering yourself with time at the spa or vacations on the beach. 

While they certainly can be a form of Self-care, more importantly than these lavish experiences, it's about taking daily actions that nourish your body, mind, and spirit. 

It's about having a compassionate and supportive inner dialogue with yourself, especially when you are going through stormy times. 

Self-care is intentionally engaging in activities that bring you joy, rest, fulfillment, and growth. 

It's about connecting with others who share your values, interests, and passions. 

This act is not a luxury or a privilege. 

It is a necessity for human flourishing and wellbeing—a way of honoring yourself and your potential. 

It is a way of respecting your boundaries and your limits. 

It is a way of celebrating your strengths and your uniqueness. 

It is a way of loving yourself and your life.

Self-care is the art of sacred selfishness—an art that we can all master.

One of the benefits of practicing self-care on a consistent basis is that we begin to trust ourselves to genuinely look out for our authentic needs. 

We become our own best friend—our own greatest ally.

Doing this develops a natural confidence—not the false type that looks like a mask of arrogance, but the real calm, trusting, and able state that confidence provides.

Self-care, acted out consistently, is the shield against burnout, anxiety, and other self-doubting beliefs. 

In its true form, it is the way towards Self-love. 

When we love ourselves, we can love others more deeply and authentically. 

Self-care is not only good for us, but for everyone around us. 

So...

Next time you're feeling overwhelmed... ask yourself, 

"What do I need right now to feel safe?"

Then, honor whatever comes up for you, whether it's socially acceptable or not.

Our cultural "norms" (many of which are unhealthy) act as a form of peer pressure.

Let the outside noise go, tune inward, and connect with what feels true to you. 

Until next time,

Be well :)